Allah's Plan

As salaamu'alaykum everyone!!!

It was our intention to be in Senegal at this time, but Allah clearly had a different plan. We were due to leave on Tuesday the 25th of July, but on the previous Friday my son fell on the playground and broke his arm. The technical description of the break is a supracondylar fracture of the humerus, which basically means that he completely broke the bone of his upper arm, just above the elbow. He is 10 years old, and it turns out this is an unusual fracture for a child his age. It is typically found in younger children.

It became clear pretty quickly that we were going to need to change our tickets, as he had to have surgery that night to place two pins to hold the bone. I was feeling a lot of stress with the uncertainty of how things would come to pass, and with the additional financial burden of medical expenses, fees to change our tickets (although we have still not heard the final word from South African Airlines on what their charges will be...we are hoping for the best of course), not to mention the feelings a parent has when their child is injured, not to mention in surgery. Patience has never been one of my strong points, but I can imagine myself being in worse spiritual condition under the circumstances than I was. I felt almost in a daze...sort of shellshocked in a way...especially as the days of witnessing his pain and incapacitation wore on. But I do not lament this turn of events, for in them is a test for us, a purification, and a sign from Allah that we must delay our departure. I may never know the deepest of reasons for that, but I trust that this plan is the best one.

It has been very difficult as a mother to see my child in pain, and to have done everything I can for him, and not be able to alleviate his discomfort any further. I cannot imagine what it must be like to have a child with a chronic or terminal condition, for every instinct in us pushes us to want to help our children in any way we can. It has also been a trial to try and teach him that screaming and yelling, and being short tempered with those around him is unacceptable, even under the worst of circumstances. Sometimes Allah places suffering on us, but it is still necessary for us to handle that in the best way we can, and to be especially gracious to those who are trying to help us. He is doing much better today, alhumdulillah, but I believe I will have to reinforce that understanding with him as he undergoes physical therapy in order to regain movement in his elbow once the pins are removed.

Ahh...and I forgot to mention that he ended up needing a second surgery last Wednesday, as the first set of pins had slipped. We thought this surgery would not be as difficult as the first, but it turned out that it was in fact much more painful, with three pins in place now across the bone. Alhumdulillah it looks good now, and it appears he will not need any further revisions. But is pain has been very intense, and a great trial for all of us involved. I feel very grateful today that he is doing so much better.

And so now we are here...caring for the children...preparing again to travel for the sake of Allah...for the purpose of gaining knowledge and understading of His book. I feel somewhat in limbo, a traveler in my own home, as much of my life is packed (or is about to be packed) in preparation for our journey. I do not understand how this plan of Allah's will work, but I know that no matter where I am, I will find Him. And I know that if my intention is sincere, He will bring me all that I need to walk the path to Him, sometimes in the most unexpected of ways.

There are many blessings to be found in these additional weeks we have here in America, blessings for us, our friends, and our families. I am thankful for these, and pray that when our time does come to depart, insha'Allah, that we will be in the best of states to enter into a new world of discovery.